Anything de facto, or ex de facto related, including relationships, separation, division of assets, child custody and the mutlitude of other issues, questions and experiences that ex de facto mums experience.
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By ladlam94
My ex left while I was pregnant and showed up three weeks after my daughter was born. He visits my six month old occassionaly at my home and we go to his home every second weekend for a couple of hours during the day as we were hoping to restart our relationship. I have decided I do not want to continue the relationship. My daughter has never lived with this man and has never spent more then a 5hours with him, I have always been present during their visits. He believes he should be able to have her overnight with out my supervision once a fortnight, she's breastfed so this is impossible. just hoping for some ideas for visitation that's appropriate for a six month old breastfed baby?
By Mum22
In order to build a bond and therefore relationship, short frequent visits is ideal. 1-2 hours 2-3 times each week, so that you daughter can get used to spending time with her father, supervised by you to start with ( so that she knows he is 'safe') then with you gradually withdrawing, to the point where she can stay with him for those periods without you being there.
Ideally, from there, you would seek to increase time spent on a gradual basis, say extending day-time contact to 4 hours, then longer until eventually a whole day, which could then lead into overnights. I would not be offering overnights until at least 3 years, depending on the nature of the relationship between daughter and father.
Of course problems arise when father cannot accept the needs of the child,a and insists on overnights, with no idea of how to look after the child. Breastfeeding is important, and good on you, so should, not be interrupted by time away overnight.
Stand your ground on this. YOUR bond with your daughter is sacred and should not be disturbed just cos dad came back on the scene.