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#16765
Hi, I am new here.. found this forum as I have been searching for a support community for people who have or have been trying to get or have got out of emotionally abusive relationships? (I would really love to hear some success stories, and how you got over the debilitating fear factor!???)
My story in a nutshell... we have 2 children together, 2 and 4, and while the dad is not a monster, he has these outbursts of aggression and threatening... this has never developed into anything physical, yet i feel fear. We are currently separated and he has moved out, however he is still hanging onto hope we will get back together and every time i try clarify its truly over he has these 'rages' and then later he cools down. I don't know what my ultimate fear is, but at the moment i am too scared to tell him there is absolutely no hope, even though in my heart there isn't. Also for the children's sake. I am sure i am not the only one who has ever felt so threatened and fearful... but how have other people overcome this?
I need help... feeling weak and like a loser..
#16774
i gently pushed out my abusive ex 8 years ago, my children see him occasionally and always with someone else. His anger and interest depends on what is going on in his life. I am still very scared of him, but my children have grown up in a relatively peaceful home where no one flies into a rage because the laundry is not folded as they want :) The rages and angry threats do count as violence... I can hear the very real fear in your words.

I got and get through it day by day, and with support from police and DV and legal services. They will understand your situation, it sounds like the kind they deal with everyday, sadly.

It sounds very like domestic violence, I think if you contact your local police to talk to their domestic violence team this may be helpful?
Also ask them about DV counselling in your area.
You have come along way already but I do understand how frightening this must be and I'd advise you to get professional advice to try and keep yourself safe....

And get some dv specific counselling and legal advice - you need some good people on your side...

Take it very easy and trust your instincts- you sound like you've got your priorities very straight...

Has anyone discussed a safety plan with you?